Thank you for meeting us this morning and remembering to wear pants, TCMV.

Oh, my pleasure.

Congratulations on being the new head editor of Below The Belt. We have high hopes for you.

Well you know what they say, approval from imaginary shadowy bureaucrats is half the battle.

Indeed. Now, before you take on your new role we have some questions for you, in case a "situation" arises. As editor, your deeds and actions may be subject to scrutiny, and we need to--

Okay, I think know what this is about, and I'd rather just come out and say it.

I'm a socialist.

And not the mostly harmless "I think medicine should be cheaper" type Faux News likes to parade on their news programs as the scourge of the Amurrrican standard of living. No, I'm the wrongbad kind of socialist. The kind that reads Marx and listens to Rage Against The Machine and swears she gets it, dude. I've protested, rallied, passed out literature to classmates. I even learned to play the musical saw as a "sign of solidarity for the fire-forged beauty of the working class soul" because that's what you do when you have a B.A. in Performance Art and have never worked manual labor for minimal pay in your entire adult life. I'm over-educated, out of touch, and insulated by the abundance of liberal-minded family, friends, and teachers. It's a shame capitalism doesn't actually work. My sheer existence proves a pretty solid case for socialism as a pastime for privileged white people.

Let's skip the foreplay and dive right into the awkward post-coital processing. I have tried to draw parallels between my socialist ideals and my queer identity. Do I really need to elaborate on how and why it's hard to find steady work as an out trans persyn? Can you go ahead and just connect the dots without me having to number them? It's hard being queer in a recession. Behind door number 1 is the hope that by merit of your skill and luck in finding liberal employers, you may one day climb up the ranks and will use your experience and influence to make the workplace a safer place for those like you. Behind door number 2 is admitting that the system is corrupt and will oppress minorities of any kind, and even if we do "integrate" they'll just find someone else to put out on the streets and play keep away with their medicine, and that we can either help overthrow the system or one day contribute to the oppression. Pay no attention to Door Number 3. Stephen Fry's in there with his head on his desk. I'm not letting him out until he's had time to think about what he's done.

So I got these views and a plethora of avenues to express/influence them. I'm the editor in chief of this blog and co-founder of TransFix. Just replace all our writers with ones recruited from socialist publications, use TransFix funds to establish a Marxist library, be home in time for Robot Chicken and finish this sentence uninterrup--

A WILD "ETHICS" APPEARS!

IT USES "CRISIS OF CONSCIENCE"!

IT'S SUPER EFFECTIVE!

God damn it. I knew I should've gone with Yu-Gi-Oh.

As a community organizer and activist, I am beholden to those that contribute their time and money to my causes. This is why I am hesitant, might even go as far to say likely to reject, the option to be a non-profit. Many well-meaning grassroots campaigns end up spending their days laughing politely at the jokes of their benefactors and choking down the shitty food served at fundraiser dinners. As of now I am accountable only to the community, and so far I'm keeping up my end of the bargain. I'm hosting events, creating spaces, submitting material that is in line with this blog's mission statement.

If I take a hard line socialist stance on my activism and shape my efforts in such a way I risk a) potentially alienating people within the very community I sought out to help, b) garnering support from socialist organizations that are not tied to or affiliated with the queer community, thus putting me in the position of serving two masters when I'm submissive at most two, three days a month, c) attracting opposition from groups within the queer community with differing agendas who will actively counter my efforts which I don't have time for, and d) leaves me open to receive twice as much "benefit" (as everyone who actively campaigns for a cause that effects them sees to benefit from its success) from my efforts than others in my organization which, on a personal level, makes me very uncomfortable.

While it is hard (for me) to fathom and even harder to accept, for many LGBT people integration into the kyriarchy is not a sign of defeat but a goal. This, for me, explains the Human Rights Campaign, the gender essentialism espoused by trans folk of generations previous, and Will & Grace. I disagree with this agenda and will say so to its face any time I am not acting on behalf of Below The Belt or TransFix (for the record, I consider my written contributions separate from my duties as editor). While serving in the capacity of such and such for blah blah blah, I will treat the spaces within my sphere as neutral territory, as hallowed ground.

As far as the trans community is concerned, my only politics is to win.

I believe it's possible to be anti-capitalist as a function to the causes I participate in. I do not ever intend to "profit" from my work, and if I ever receive compensation for my time and effort I will be ever so transparent about how much I received, what it was for and prove, if necessary, that I could not afford to pay bills, get around, etc without it. Any and all funds I raise will go towards the cause, and I'll back that shit up with receipts. If the big four-day camp TransFix is holding in the summer of 2011 can't be done at no cost to the attendees, I will bust my ass to make the admission equal to or less than the fare you spend for public transit. I will not accept money for any content published on this blog or any other blog within the queer blogosphere that I contribute to. If I'm caught cheating on my taxes, I promise it will be for trying to write a $2.50 metal kazoo off as a "business expense".

But is it really possible to have an anti-capitalist ethic, to implement it as a means of running an organization, without endorsing certain political tenets? I have no fucking idea. Personally, I believe so, but I also believe in chupacabras, the faked deaths of Elvis and Andy Kaufman, and I'm in a better mood when I have lots of soy in my diet. I'm not necessarily inclined to trust my own judgment on this. Feedback is most appreciated.

Whew. That felt good to get out. Okay. Next question.

Actually, we were just going to ask you if you had an e-mail address people could use to contact you about becoming a contributor or to voice comments/concerns with any of the content expressed on this blog.

Oh. Yeah. theycallmevroom@gmail.com

Thank you. Actually, I think that's all we needed to know.

I also got Ravenclaw in a "Which Hogwarts House Are You?" quiz, in case that's helpful.

You know people are still reading this, right?

Of course they are. They're waiting for my signature snappy comedic ending.

Well, I'm going to leave , thank you for meeting with me--

That's what she said! Booya! See you next time!

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