Penelope Trunk, CEO of the website brazencareerist.com recently tweeted about her miscarriage, thankful that she won't have to have an abortion, which in her home state of Wisconsin requires a 3-week waiting period. And believe it or not, the interwebs are all riled up over it. On both sides. She was even interviewed on CNN.

At first I thought "why??? why would you share that??" But then I read her post on why she would. And I'm glad she posted. For three reasons:



1. Miscarriage is a natural function. It happens. It happens more than we may realize. And it's not just a quick thing. It happens for awhile. It can be sad, it can be a relief. But it's common. So why don't we talk about? Now, I know women talk about it, quickly and quietly ("Oh did you hear? Sue lost her baby. Yeah, 6 weeks. Sad. ... So what's for lunch?"). It's usually a sad event in someone's life. A broken promise. A chance ended. A friend of mine just lost her baby, 5 days from her due date. It's tragic. But it's part of life. Why do we act like it is a big secret, a hushed occurrence? Many women experience them. According to Penelope, 75% of women. So for many of us, it's a common part of being a woman, or having a uterus.

2. Abortion is a right in the US. Whether or not you agree with it, it is still a right. But many states are chipping away at that right, like Wisconsin's 3-week waiting period. Penelope Trunk is a 42-year-old mother of two. Why would we make her wait 3 weeks? She's an adult that can make her own choices. Do we make people arbitrarily wait 3 weeks for other procedures? Also, to some people, abortion is "ending a life." But to others, it's giving a life back. It's a procedure. A surgery. Pro-choicers don't deny that it's "murder." But sometimes it's the best choice that can be made. So if Penelope didn't have a miscarriage, should she carry this baby to term? At the expense of the two kids she already has (although I don't know her reasons for not wanting a baby ... but they're her reasons and her choice). I have another friend who has two beautiful children, but both of her pregnancies were very difficult for her. Her physician told her if she got pregnant again, he would strongly advise she abort. Would the pro-life movement argue she carry the baby to term? Even if it could kill her? How is that pro-life - leaving the two children she already has without a mother?

My point is, abortion is a right, but it's a right we rarely talk about calmly. Penelope talks about it calmly, without shame. We need more of it that. The more we can talk about abortion objectively, the less it's this mythical scary evil terrible thing that only devil women choose to have. Lots of compassionate, rational, smart, successful, caring, kind women choose to have abortions. It's not just the tramps and the hussies and the evil selfish bitches.

3. Her post is a sign of the times. We expose ourselves so much these days: online on sites like Facebook, Twitter, You Tube. On television on reality shows and talk shows. Everywhere you look, it's TMI. But that's the way it is. That's what gets attention these days. It almost seems unnatural that I don't post my every thought and activity and photo ever taken on Facebook. (I guess I'm a hold out in this sense?) So why shouldn't someone be open about a miscarriage? It's something many women have experience, and thus can relate to, so why not get it out there? For the longest time we couldn't talk about periods or sex or poop, but now we can, and it's taken some of the taboo away from it. Will this tweet help take the "hush hush" attitude away from miscarriages?